Monday, June 8, 2009

Working Monday

This is the 2nd week in a row I have had to work on a Monday again. While it all evens out (next week I will be off 2 days), I am missing Zach and I's special time together! I want as much time together while it is just the 2 of us before we add the newest addition to the family!! We had such a good weekend and I don't think either of us wanted to be apart this morning. I must admit I shed a tear or two on the drive in this morning...topped off by hearing "I Can Only Imagine" which always bring the lump in the throat out thinking of Rachel.... I just pray that he knows how much Matt and I love him even if we do have to work. The mommy guilt was in full force today but I stopped and reminded myself I am doing only what I am able and am just thankful for all the time we do get together!

Zachary is just growing up so quickly. I marvel at recent pictures of him. Where did my little baby boy go? He still looked like a baby at his 1st birthday...even though he had been running since he was 10 months old! His face was still round, not much hair, less teeth....But recent pics show a slowly fulling head of hear, a mouth full of teeth, less full cheeks and he even has hair on his legs! If only I could stop the hands of time for just a few moments to really soak it all in.

I have my monthly doctor appointment today and still cannot believe at times that we will be adding to our family in just a few short months. I pray endlessly that Zach will adjust okay to the new addition and that he won't kill the baby (we are in a bit of a smacking phase right now!) ;-) And I pray that the boys will be the best of buddies all their lives. Sibling rivalry can run deep and I hope that while some levels of competition is healthy, that they will be able to see past some of it too. And I pray that Matt and I can give to the boys enough attention and time that they will both deserve but in my head sometimes seems impossible since they will both be at demanding ages. But I know that others before us have made it through and so will we....just hoping I don't screw it up too badly!

All the things that whir through my head these days when I am up not sleeping at night or commuting to work every day!!

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